Thursday, March 31, 2005

someone help jessica simpson! she's been shot! in our dreams. nah, she's just wearing some awful jackson pollock-inspired couture top. oh well.

brad pitt and angelina jolie are on the fast track to becoming mr. and mrs. offscreen as well as on. according to some reports, they recently shared a suite in palm springs' le parker meridien hotel under the names bryce and jasmine pilaf. if the porn star-esque pseudonyms are any indication, things must have gotten pretty kinky.

is halle berry getting hot and heavy with heavy d? all this has got heavy wondering: now that he's found love, what is he gonna do with it?

as oprah's old theme song exclaimed, she's every woman. so now it seems she's playing the role of single woman. star is reporting her romance of 19 years with stedman graham is on the rocks. serves him right: he should have forced a ring on that finger of hers years ago.

omg, gag me with a spoon. the information you so didn't want to have.

it seems elisha cuthbert's the latest victim of the body snatchers. wonder how thighs feels about seeing his lady love in such rough shape? admittedly, though, we probably look like a zombie when we're doing electronics shopping at best buy too.

britney spears may hate the "false tabloids," but she does listen to them. it seems she was very upset by the idea that her "fine hubby" kevin federline may have been prancing around las vegas on the arm of a vip escort last weekend. the story caused her to get into a big argument that ended with britney in tears and kevin being kicked to the curb. don't fret, though. if these pictures are any indication, the volatile couple has already kissed and made up.

more demi and ashton baby and wedding fodder

say it isn't so. mary-kate olsen may be returning to the west coast next year to study at ucla. we'd better make it nyc soon if we ever hope to have an mk sighting. on a side note: the move may be good for her puppy, luca. i mean, who buys a labrador in nyc? runyon canyon is a much better place for her.

while it must be hard for jennifer lopez to cope with the peta campaign against her, it's nice to see that her butt is taking it all in good stride.