Friday, May 21, 2004

vincent gallo update: the brown bunny is finally going to go from a joke so gigantic it was referenced on gilmore girls to a release so limited that i might have to travel to new york to see chloe sevigny give on-screen, unsimulated head.

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

either colin farrell is totally insane or he has taken his love of the irish/british custom of taking the piss to a new level. that's right, colin farrell is taking the piss while taking a piss. clearly he hasn't been schooled in the delicate topic of urinal ettiquette. don't let this happen to you.

Monday, May 17, 2004

this weekend i saw jay-z's 99 problems video starring rick rubin and vincent gallo?!? rubin's appearance makes sense but gallo? i don't get it. i can't really see him getting down with j and beyonce. call me crazy. speaking of crazy, i saw helter skelter over the weekend. it wasn't very good but jeremy davies was awesome as charles manson. he had his voice and mannerisms down perfectly. the movie didn't really do any background on any of the key players which was kind of lame. i would have liked it if it had started with scenes about manson's childhood. i guess the movie was supposed to be about the killings and not manson himself though. i could have sworn they showed a clip in the movie of "rick rubin" announcing that he was a fan of manson's. but then i looked up producer rick rubin and he was only born 6 years before the murders took place. i guess it was a different rubin. but the guy had the crazy facial hair and everything. maybe it was his dad . . . and since we're on the subject of dads, chris martin is now playing one to gwyneth paltrow's mom. they named their kid apple.

Friday, May 14, 2004

i was kind of hoping that cheeto-fan britney spears was just hanging out with kevin federline when both us weekly and the star did cover stories on their "romance." i mean, really, breaking up the relationships of two pregnant women in one year? besides, until then, there was no real evidence that they shared anything more than a love of stupid baseball caps. but now the sun has published photos of them humping on a rock. so much for my naive hopes.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

considering my olsen twins fascination, i am loving this piece of gossip from the post. mary-kate is so "bohemian" that she totally has to be sparking up a doobie at least once a week. too bad about her boyfriend, though. he probably let all of his paparazzi coverage go to his head. i mean, who would he be without mk? just the heir to the dreamworks fortune. big whoop. and i really wish there was a ashley sex tape circulating the internet because the full-length paris hilton video left me cold.

Friday, May 07, 2004

i listen to musicmatch jukebox at work and they constantly play cracker. i had literally not heard this band for at least 5 or 6 years and then suddenly they're on heavy rotation. i thought they had disappeared into obscurity but apparently not. they have a new album!?! yeah, it totally weirds me out too. the one song they play all the time on mmjb is gross. it is entitled "ain't gonna suck itself." i'll let you figure that one out. i suppose if there is one good thing about being single, it is never having to hear that phrase spoken in your direction.
i've never really utilized this forum to denigrate my boss before but i've had about as much as i can take. the following are excerpts from an actual "article" that she expected to have published regarding our upcoming health fair.

". . . The event will take place in Clubhouse 1, which has a much larger area which will enable us to have double the exhibitors than last year . . . Find the answers to the questions and get a chance to win prizes. The first person to get all the answers will win a prize! . . . Mark your calendar today, Thursday, May 27th from 9-1pm to learn about healthy living while having a good time. Tell your friends and neighbors to join you and share a cup of coffee. We look forward to seeing you there. Check out the Health Fair, Healthy Living Health Fair in Club House 1 in the auditorium. See you there! Be sure to attend this informative event. Lots of giveaways!"

as if the godforsaken grammar wasn't bad enough, she has to add incredible redundancies and stuff that plain doesn't make sense. i mean, today is not thursday, may 27th, but she sure makes it sound like it is. i could write a whole paper about how horrible this writing is, but i'll spare you. i just had to vent for a minute.

Thursday, May 06, 2004

i'm going through a major olsen twins crush right now, but a picture i saw today really grossed me out. i mean i have been reading all about how my favorite, mary-kate, is supposedly anorexic, but jeez these pictures kind of make it seem true. scan down the page for the shots of her turned around in that purple dress. her ribs are poking out as far as the eye can see. if i ever fulfill my dream of meeting them, i will have to make sure it's a catered event.

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

i just got back from la last night. i was visiting a friend of mine. it's weird how you can miss someone so quickly after just having spent time with them. i'm referring to my brief run-in with kato kaelin. he was at the bigfoot lodge right before last call. he didn't stick around long, though, and my heart aches for him. what can you do?