Friday, December 31, 2004

beyonce and jay-z in the caribbean begin an all beach-photos edition of britpoppa and b proves that you can never be too rich to wear boy shorts. poor gal, she had no friends when she was little.

michelle williams, of "dawson's creek" not destiny's child, is still swapping spit with heath ledger. the couple were recently spotted canoodling at the beach in australia.

turns out jessica simpson's mom might be just as weird as her dad. she used to pull at her daughter's legs before tucking her in at night to lengthen them. mrs. simpson, next time try milk. it does a body good.

kevin federline has demanded that his bride, britney spears, stop spending his potential alimony money. he told her that she cannot buy any more clothing until she clears out her closet, which is bursting at the seams.

donald trump is looking to expand his ever growing list of namesake products by doing the unthinkable, a line of hair products. there's always a market for gag gifts.

anna nicole smith had better get another spokeswoman job fast. her "stepson" won an appeal of the case that awarded her $88.5 million of her dead husband's estate despite the fact she was not mentioned in his will.

why couldn't kirsten dunst have pulled down those bikini straps just a little bit further? she's no lindsay lohan, but those are some bodacious Ts. hint: if you want to make her cry, throw on some coldplay.

contact music impossibly reports that kate hudson will earn $85 million as jeannie in the i dream of jeannie movie. she may play the part, but i'm doubting that will be the figure on her paycheck.

mariah carey received a diamond butterfly necklace worth half a million dollars from a mystery suitor who wants to marry her. this guy must not have seen glitter.

paris hilton was more than just fashionably late to the opening of her nightclub in orlando, florida last night. she missed her flight and ended up arriving six hours after her scheduled appearance. paris had been flying back from the swiss alps where she was feverishly resented by the local aristocrats. you do one night vision sex tape and your social status goes down the drain.

there were likely tears streaming down the face of this mickey's blue eyes when hugh grant was "stung by a bloody jellyfish" while on holiday with girlfriend jemima khan in barbados. apparently the mishap was "hilarious".

samuel l. jackson wasn't always the smooth motha we all know him to be. he used to be attached to the end of a crack pipe. he only learned to "just say no" in 1990, when his daughter found him passed out. way to go (vassar grad), zoe.

bjork has a pretty protective entourage. when she was accidentally covered in ice water due to a fashion designer's stupidity, her minions pounced and caused a ruckus.

uma thurman yanks at her bikini bottoms while vacationing in st. bart's (same as kiki) with boyfriend, andre balasz. again, next time tug a little harder, please.

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

that'll teach you to put baby in a corner. jerry orbach, the beloved lennie of "law and order", died last night of prostate cancer. he was 69. let's hope the the first words the beauty and the beast star hears, as the angels welcome him into the gates of heaven, are, "be our guest".
stephen dorff takes a step up from throwing things in a britney spears video to making out with a tool time girl. some paparazzi caught him getting a smooch from his new gal pal, pamela anderson.

jet li proved himself a real hero when he rescued himself and his daughter from a tsunami that entered his hotel in the maldives. despite being dinged by a piece of furniture and sustaining a minor foot injury, the kung-fu fighter was relatively unharmed.

girl's got a thing for white boys. lucy liu has left her playwright boyfriend for mary mccormack's brother, will.

lil' jon gets totally low when it comes to usher. the rapper has come to refer to his collaborator as "baby usher", which he says in a high-pitched voice. that's cold.

justin timberlake smoked an l in the back of the benzy with nelly. the rapper has revealed to british fhm that he and the musical manchild have passed a few doobies back and forth.

will smith and his lady were no shows at a christmas party that mariah carey threw in aspen. their absence wouldn't have been such a big deal if they hadn't reserved a good portion of the bar for themselves and their entourage.

scarlett johansson clearly can't hang with the r&b crowd. she thinks that people who thank god in acceptance speeches are "goofy".

kevin, don't you think it's a little too far after labor day to be wearing all that white?

gruesome blind item: "Which rail-thin actress in a current blockbuster controlled her cravings on set by going through cases of zero-cal 'I Can't Believe It's Not Butter' spray, which she squirted straight into her mouth?" i'm going to say teri polo from meet the fockers.

the "desperate housewives" had a fit when they saw an attractive young woman in revealing clothes on their set. if anyone's going to dress like a slut, it's one of them. i'm guessing they might have a similar problem when their celebrity fan, cameron diaz, makes a cameo.

sharon osbourne will star in a production of feminist favorite, the vagina monologues, which the mirror calls "a foul-mouthed play about women's private parts". winona ryder, susan sarandon, brittany murphy are just a few of the many other thespians who have participated in past showings of the play.

wilmer valderrama claims that his romance with lindsay lohan has hurt his career, even though the fling is the only reason why britpoppa and countless others now know how to correctly spell the "'70's show" star's last name.

kate beckinsale sure has a big mouth. she leaked the scoop that ben affleck had to have his teeth "fixed" while filming pearl harbor. so that gorgeous colgate smile isn't real?

heather graham's career has gone even further south. she's been demoted from tv actress to video game voice-over provider. she takes on the role of antonia bayle in the playstation game, everquest ii.

gwen stefani attempts to transform the hairnet from high school cafeteria accessory to high fashion accessory.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

vida appears to have gotten through her disappearance unscathed even though her mama, gisele bundchen may be facing a lawsuit. but, come to think of it, she looks fine, too.

supermodel petra nemcova held on for dear life for eight hours as she was caught up in the tsunamis. she is in the hospital after clinging to a tree to save herself and her photographer boyfriend is missing.

minnie driver turned down a chance at becoming mariah carey. mariah's ex-husband, tommy mottola, offered the circle of friends star a chance at r&b superstardom, but she turned it down because, much to the disappointment of wreckx-n-effect, she's not much of a rumpshaker.

wanna see madonna's new versace pics? check them out. also see uma in louis vuitton.

snoop dogg dropped a little gossip like it was hot. he admitted that his marriage came to an end because he cheated on his wife. he is now trying to reconcile with her.

john mayer had some trouble running through the halls of his high school last week. he was left out of the school's hall of fame induction because of security issues.

frances bean cobain is turning out to be quite a looker. clearly, she's taking over her father, not her mother.

naomi campbell might not be doing it for poppy anymore, but there seems to be no shortage of women who will. usher is dating three ladies right now, joy bryant, eishia brightwell and karrine steffans.

if you've been going through noxzema girl withdrawal, head to broadway this spring. there, dylan's one time bride on "90210", rebecca gayheart, will be playing the julia roberts role in the stage production of steel magnolias alongside delta burke.

jenny mccarthy refused her husband sex for eight months before coming back horny with a vengeance. i don't know how he put up with it. i mean, if you marry jenny mccarthy, isn't it pretty much for the sex?

tea leoni was flirting with disaster on the set of her latest film, spanglish. she had so many disagreements with director james l. brooks that she was unofficially fired twice.

newly raven-haired elijah wood practices the stance he perfected while making the porno flick, lord of the rims.

Monday, December 27, 2004

dj am likes two handfuls. he goes for the double grasp of girlfriend, nicole ritchie's sweet ass after dinner at la's hip eatery, koi.

liza minnelli was rushed to the hospital this morning after falling out of bed and hitting her head. liza, no more monkeys jumping on the bed!

celebrities, they're just like us: matthew perry has developed a new addiction. he's moved from painkillers to online poker, just like half of britpoppa's friends. silly, chandler. those syndication checks only go so far.

speaking of addicts, george carlin entered a drug rehabilitation facility in an attempt to rid himself of his own little painkiller problem. he's also revealed himself to be a wino. it's hard to dull the pain of deafening silence, isn't it?

lindsay lohan still hasn't moved on from her onscreen love, chad michael murray. the wb "it boy" and lohan's co-star in freaky friday has been receiving numerous flirtacious phone calls from the actress-cum-singer and her pal, paris hilton. this is all much to the chagrin of murray's fiancee, sophia bush, who is the subject of redhead's teasing in the calls.

heath ledger learned the hard way on "regis and kelly" that sometimes australian slang doesn't translate in the states. said the lion-looking actor, "i told him that me and my mates liked to put on our thongs and grab weenies." just as foster's is australian for beer, thong is australian for flip-flop.

orlando bloom seems a little more interested in the autograph hounds than his lady, kate bosworth. can't blame him. gawker points out the fact that she might not make the most intellectually stimulating company.

proving that he has no fear of overexposure, usher will premiere a 20-minute film of himself with joy bryant on fox new year's eve.

imdb news:
  • mischa barton hopes to get a "fixer upper" home in la in 2005. somehow i doubt she'll be the one doing the fixing.
  • i'm guessing lindsay lohan may end up in the hospital with exhaustion again. she's due to be both in ny and miami for new years.
  • the beckhams's christening of their sons is being criticized by the church as it did not take place in a consecrated church. brooklyn and romeo, purgatory here you come. for details of the lavish affair, click here.
  • javier bardem is being sued by the model whose nose he broke while dancing.
  • marlon brando's former business manager is suing the actor's estate for several offenses, including sexual harassment and unpaid commissions. if there's anyone who knows what she can get out of the man, it's his business manager.

    shannon elizabeth and her husband may be suffering marital woes. the busty brunette left her man of eight years to spend christmas in new york with his family, while she was elsewhere. look at him, can you blame her?

    bjork shows off another fabulous fashion statement on the streets of manhattan. i hear zubaz are making a comeback.
  • Saturday, December 25, 2004

    Friday, December 24, 2004

    matthew broderick is still fuming over not being asked to be a part of the cast of the life aquatic. he hopes wearing the film's signature wooly cap will erase some of the scars of the stepford wives.

    portia de rossi is having her ex-lover's initials lasered off her ring finger as she's now settled in with her new lady, ellen degeneres. i'm getting my back hair lasered off for my lover this christmas. enjoy, kitty!

    ozzy osbourne knows the way to woman's heart is through the cemetery. he used to steal flowers for sharon off of graves. what a romantic.

    makes you wonder if rebecca loos had a bit of a belly. david beckham revealed that he thinks his wife victoria is sexiest when she has a bun in the oven.

    also beckham related, if your rack was as nice as liz hurley's you might be ignoring dress codes too. the shagalicious austin powers star disregarded vic's request to dress modestly for her son's christening and may have ended up on the spice girl's naughty list.

    with lindsay lohan, paris hilton and angelina jolie hopping in and out of his bed, can you believe that colin farrell gets lonely sometimes? it's not easy being green.

    speaking of angelina, the hollywood wild child has bought herself a predictable christmas gift, a $20,000 motorcycle. she had to buy it fast as the dealer told her otherwise the bike would be gone in sixty seconds.

    kylie might be the hardest working woman in show business. the aussie songstress is spending tomorrow performing for 500 russian oil tycoons. i wouldn't turn down nearly $1 million to shake my ass for some ruskies, either.

    paige davis is certainly not squashing rumors of her sex tape by missing scheduled appearances. she was supposed to go on "the today show", but was inexplicably a no show. i can't wait to see her rendition of "i feel pretty" on kazaa.

    j. lo shows some of her signature self-love in a new promo shot for her "rebirth" album due out this spring.

    always generous, bono has created a school of sorts to teach rock stars to be better at their job. the scissor sisters and the killers, among others, have listened to the irishman's advice regarding homesickness and public relations. "i say some really basic things - like, if you go over and you tell americans they're stupid, they're probably not going to come and see you." sure we will bono, americans are fond of self-loathing.

    poor teri hatcher. the former lois lane will be wearing a cast on her toe this christmas. she broke her toe when a party guest stepped on it.

    awesome imdb news: ricky gervais of the brilliant uk show, "the office" is going to write an episode of "the simpsons". bizarre imdb news: kevin spacey is having six oil portraits of himself as bobby darin commissioned.

    gwen stefani only has one thing that stays in the way of her picture perfect figure: pizza. i know your pain, girly.

    britpoppa's least favorite celebrity, fur-wearing blabbermouth sharon stone, is getting naked for a romantic comedy with bill murray directed by jim jarmusch. good call, jim. if you have to deal with the bitch, it's a lot easier if you can just stare at her Ts.

    kate beckinsale has been pick-pocketed twice since landing in london for appearances the aviator. i can't blame the pick-pockets. they're just taking good charlotte's advice: if you're gonna rob someone, choose a movie star.

    access hollywood's" billy bush has lost the show another star. his embarrassingly juvenile nude scene questions have cost him future interviews with leonardo dicaprio. doesn't the president's cousin know leo's an artist?

    there isn't really anyone on the end of that phone call, is there, ethan? didn't think so.

    Thursday, December 23, 2004

    if you're spending christmas all by your lonesome, chances are you might throw on a smiths disk or two. nothing says melancholia like a morose morrissey. well, in case you want to change things up a little bit, here are some smiths covers for your blue christmas. enjoy!

    low - last night i dreamt that somebody loved me
    belle and sebastian - the boy with the thorn in his side
    liv tyler and royston langdon beam over their tiny new baby, milo. no snarky remarks here. this is precious.

    jennifer lopez's ex-husband has learned that, contrary to the title of one of her biggest hits, her love cost him $1,000 a week. lopez had given ojani noa a job managing her restaurant, madre's, but recently fired him. he's now suing j. lo for wrongful termination.

    mtv is hoping the next "real world" cast will give us some dazed and confused antics. they're moving the show to austin, tejas.

    gwyneth paltrow and chris martin are already talking about having baby number two. what's an apple without an orange?

    have you got a thing for jail bait hottie shia labeouf too? stalk him on myspace (via oh no they didn't).

    adam duritz's future fans may need help counting crows, or anything for that matter. raffi wannabe is planning on doing an album for children.

    i donated blood and all i got was this lousy penn and teller ticket. the magician/comedians are giving tickets to their vegas performances away to anyone who donates blood by january 1st.

    claire danes has lots of gifts to wrap for beau, billy crudup. she's also wrapped herself up in a north face michelin man look.

    toby maguire's long term girlfriend, jen meyer, is mixing business with pleasure. the executive for ralph lauren is trying to convince her personal spiderman to model for the designer.

    i never thought i'd see the day. liam and noel gallagher are showing a little brotherly love. the famously fueding brothers from oasis are throwing a party together to celebrate their friends and family. they shelled out almost $20k on booze alone.

    does this surprise anyone? robbie williams enjoys recording his songs in the buff.

    as julia roberts was headed to the hospital to give birth to finn and hazel, her car broke down. she and husband, danny moder, were luckily picked up by a cab.

    cheating an old lady out of money is so punk rock. johnny ramone's wife is refusing to send his mother the monthly checks that he promised her.

    yes, jessica, your most important assets are still in place. mrs. lachey does what many a man wishes he could do to her in maui.

    Wednesday, December 22, 2004

    so this week was slow with only two guesses for my celebrity guessing game. could be because i made it so easy. yes, this possibly xxx picture is of xxx-tina aguilera. and both participants guessed correctly. way to go. and to that former guest blogger who keeps blowing me away with his accuracy, how do you do it?
    ooh, burn kelso, if someone told you that argyle trucker hats were in any way attractive, you definitely got punked.

    more info on the paige davis sex tape: the video supposedly captures the tlc hostess singing "i feel pretty" in the shower. it was filmed in 1997 when the only things she was trading were sexual favors.

    dick clark is still in the hospital after suffering a stroke earlier this month. he may be watching regis host his annual "new year's rockin' eve" program from a craftmatic adjustable bed at cedars sinai. poor thing.

    "my name is ashley." "your name is ashley." ashley olsen is taking classes in the meisner acting technique for $300 a month. she must still be feeling the burn from when m-k got an emmy nomination and she did not.

    clay aiken's lover may not be as "invisible" as he hopes. rumor has it, the "american idol" runner-up's hairdresser may be doing more than just his client's hair.

    posh and becks are out to try and prove their intelligence (and possibly the stability of their marriage) by going on the british version of "who wants to be a millionaire". i think the only thing they'll manage to prove is whether or not victoria is indeed preggers.

    uma thurman is tipped to be replacing nicole kidman in the movie remake of the producers. this may be good news for co-star, matthew broderick, since the last movie he made with kidman, the stepford wives was the definition of awful.

    christina aguilera rides dumbo at disneyland while exploring a bizarre santa/shirley temple look.

    here's another reason to resent anna wintour. the vogue editor has her teen vogue staff send out for samples from designers in order to pile up more presents under her own tree. the samples go to her teen daughter bee shaffer, who has her name honorarily on the masthead of the magazine.

    if jennifer aniston is no longer hot for hubby brad pitt, her recent purchases aren't showing it. she spent nearly $2,000 in london on raunchy lingerie and sex toys. maybe jenn isn't the good girl we all think she is.

    mariah carey is giving her close female friends diamond encrusted stockings for christmas. just what they always wanted. hey mariah, maybe you should give the gals the $28k straight up if you don't want to see these stockings on ebay.

    kirstie alley will serve as jenny craig's latest celebrity spokesperson because their food is "the yummiest". i have a few issues with this. first, aren't the commercials supposed to celebrate people who've already lost weight? second, if kirstie's excited about the "yummy" food, this whole losing weight thing isn't likely to happen. and finally, how can she be the "fat actress" if she's no longer fat? pier one, please rehire your full-figured fairy godmother.

    wanna get prince charles's attention? just dress like a harajuku girl. the british royal was "intrigued" by gwen stefani's look at a recent concert and gave her performance a thumbs up.

    ash, tell your sister britpoppa thinks she has a great rack, but a really shitty tan. can you say raccoon? wow.

    Tuesday, December 21, 2004

    hart is taking the holidays off and will come back when i feel like posting it again. in the meantime, britpoppa itself has gotten reviewed today. while the review is far from complimentary, it's certainly half-assed. enjoy.

    i'll be back in 2005 with a comparison of leonardo dicaprio's portrayal of howard hughes with montgomery burns's (that is if i can get my hands on that episode of "the simpsons").
    binny skitch lindsay lohan shows that she is relatively self-aware as she wears this t-shirt emblazoned with the words, "skinny bitch". this photograph was taken from a wild day of sidekick shopping as paris hilton's sidekick. read a first person account of it here.

    despite the fact that they have made a united front and looked quite happy at the la premiere of the aviator, a source is reporting that gwen stefani and gavin rossdale have broken up over that illegitimate child thing. doesn't gwen know that love means never having to say you're sorry? (via oh no they didn't)

    natasha lyonne in jail update: she was arrested on friday after threatening a neighbor's dog and throwing her mirror from the wall. weird tidbit: her landlord is michael rapaport.

    cameron diaz has purchased a $3 million home in the hollywood hills to share with her boy toy, justin timberlake, the musical manchild. in your face, naysayers.

    harry potter and the mulatto prince is due in bookstores on july 16. better start standing in line now.

    bad news kitty, george from "the apprentice" will be cutting back on his appearances in the next season. he will be replaced by 31-year-old corporate lawyer michelle scarborough. let's hope carolyn and michelle have a few cat fights to rival those of the contestants.

    nick lachey and ryan cabrera are caught, ummm, bonding in maui while their girls, jessica and ashlee shop.

    sean penn reminisces about getting boozed up by grandma, nearly killing a man and putting a cigarette out in a football player's palm.

    wesley snipes is suing nyc after a warrant for his arrest was made up because he refuses to submit to paternity tests. the woman who claims to be his baby mama is a "mentally ill crack addict". hmmm, sounds like just his type.

    naomi campbell will only "do it for poppy" if it's according to her rules. she's possibly split from man of the year, usher raymond, because his controlling ways have interfered with her controlling ways.

    velvet goldmine's jonathan rhys-meyers steals the part of elvis away from michael st. gerard. have you no heart, you irish bastard?

    scarlett johansson has her hopes up high. she wants to go for cocktails with prince william. then maybe take him back to her living room hot tub to stare at the satin wallpaper. she may also do the trendy thing right now and quit acting for charity.

    brit with her fine hubby britney and kevin federline sent out this darling christmas card to their fan club members, not knowing that christmas cards were supposed to show the senders in tacky holiday sweaters, not tacky bridal wear.

    has lisa snowdon gotten hollywood's most famous cad to settle down? she's recently been spotted with a sparkler on her wedding ring finger that may have been put there by her on-again boyfriend, george clooney.

    as if the osbournes needed any more dysfuntionality. sharon osbourne has admitted that she is bulimic. jennifer aniston proves herself equally dysfunctional as her therapist was her "surrogate mother". all those who claim her marriage is on the rocks score points as she's been spotted without her wedding ring.

    first sean john and now this? new york fashion week takes another step down by allowing jennifer lopez's j. lo line a show in february. peta does the same thing by getting the worm, dennis rodman, to pose for their "i'd rather go naked than wear fur" campaign.

    wanna puke? then read these lines from steve bing's x-mas song for girlfriend, nicole kidman:
    "I know we'll be jolly, stuff turkey and wave mistletoe. Even better with friends than flying it solo. Me? I'll do it with this seasonal chick. She's a cool cat. Untie the bow and welcome the other Saint Nic."

    anna and enrique: not married.

    i'm so goth kelly osbourne is looking more and more like the princess of darkness every day. daddy must be so proud. she's almost ready to bite the head off her first bat!

    Monday, December 20, 2004

    i've gotten a few best of blog award nominations for snarkiest blog. true, they're all from my friends so far, but it's still cool. if you want to give me a shout out too, leave a comment here. i could get some rad stuff out of the deal.
    since it's christmas, i'm going to take it pretty easy on you with britpoppa's semi-weekly celebrity guessing game. this lady recently celebrated a birthday with her long time boyfriend and britpoppa believes the "nipple" seen in this picture from their night out is really just part of a flesh-colored falsie. do you know who's been stuffing her pink bra? leave your guesses in the comments section and come back wednesday night for the answer.

    you know tara reid's 15 minutes are up when you can't even get out of the slammer by namedropping the breast-popping actress. natasha lyonne tried doing just that when she spent friday night in jail. rumor has it her american pie co-star's name wasn't the only one she was calling. the strung-out starlet was also crying, "big harry". here's her mugshot from when she was arrested on dui in miami in 2001.
    ben affleck checked out more than just the menu when he stopped by jamba juice for a smoothie the other day. word is, he borrowed $20 from a photographer to buy his beverage of choice.

    diane lane's wedding day certainly didn't bring the 39-year-old actress her happily ever after. yesterday, she had to call the cops on hubby josh brolin, who was later arrested for spousal battery. he posted $20,000 bail and posed for a mug shot that will certainly end up on the smoking gun later this week. fucking goonie.

    stay away from javier bardem on the dance floor. the actor, celebrated for his portrayal of reinaldo arenas in before night falls, fractured a model's nose while trying out some wild dance steps at the after party for his new film, the sea inside. this is one dancer who should have stayed upstairs.

    sienna miller, the girl golden fiddle loves to hate, thinks dating people magazine's sexiest man alive makes her above the law. she continually smoked at an award show, despite being asked to snuff out her cig three times.

    we know what kevin federline wants for christmas: a music career. wife britney spears is only too happy to do whatever she can to make her fine hubby's dream come true. she's working on building a recording studio for him in their malibu home.

    tom cruise visited an ice cream store while filming the war of the worlds and left $5,000 in a jar collecting money for an injured young girl. the shocking thing is not that mr. cruise is generous, but that he had 50 $100 bills in his wallet at the time. damn.

    jessica simpson reacts to the news that husband nick lachey only bought her $100k worth of christmas presents this year. last year he spend $125k.

    maybe i'll try for a job as kitty's intern. mary-kate olsen is earning college credit for the internship she's doing this semester with her boyfriend ali fatourechi. the promoter is launching his own line of jeans.

    mischa barton is terrified of birds, particularly emus. "[they] are really big," she said. "they're like psycho birds that chase you." could be she's sensitive about her resemblance to them.

    things are heating up for benecio del toro and his much younger gal pal, sara foster. she may even get the infamous cad to settle down. the oscar winner has a thing for blondes; he may have gotten intimate with scarlett johansson in an elevator after last year's oscars.

    lindsay lohan is attempting to sock it to her ex yet again by throwing a competing new year's eve party in miami. while wilmer scored the black eyed peas and dj am for his fete, lindsay snagged jessica alba and desperate housewife eva longoria. no matter whose party wins the most buzz, it's sure to be a freaky friday.

    penelope cruz gave her bandidas co-star, salma hayek, a little squeeze while promoting the film in mexico. can you blame her? salma's got some nice junk in the trunk.

    charlie sheen and denise richards are expecting another baby, just months after the birth of their first child. these two are proving themselves to be real wild things whose sex life is likely rated x. how else could charlie have given up the hookers?

    if last week's hot guy alert left you longing for more pictures of the gorgeous gaspard ullier, oh no they didn't helps you out.

    courtney love is going to tell us all what we already know. she's planning on writing a book that reveals all her dirty little secrets. this hardly comes as a surprise since courtney will reveal her secrets to anyone who bothers to listen.

    orlando bloom's new found devotion to buddhism may be reaching cultic proportions. he's been seen participating in a "commitment ceremony" for soka gakkai, a very controversial form of the religion.

    pouting just isn't really punk, but neither is pink. after avril lavigne was doused in pink paint for a video, her hair was left with remnants from the experience and had to be re-dyed. the process left ms. lavigne so cranky, she called for a closed set on her cosmo cover shoot. doesn't she know cosmos are pink? she should have left her hair that way.

    kirsten dunst makes a face as she realizes that photographers are watching her have lunch with her brother. this is one girl who's wishing she wore her invisibility cloak today.

    Friday, December 17, 2004

    there may be a reason britney spears has seemingly abandoned her maltese pup, lacy, for her new chihuahua, bitbit - and it's not doggy boot camp. it seems lacy, the former apple of brit's eye, has got some problems with flatulence. perhaps britney should take some advice from benedicte in a very long engagement. every time lacy lets one loose, simply say, "doggy fart warms my heart." it would be a great comeback single, don't you think?
    mary-kate could use a patch rockabilly enthusiast mary-kate olsen sports a ripped up stray cats t-shirt while at a salon. on her way out, she was seen wearing a pair of sweet creepers and blasting some carl perkins.

    there is a warrant out for the arrest of motley crue's vince neil, but not for "smokin' in the boys room". he knocked a sound man unconscious in a dallas night club. jail may prove to be a "bitter pill" for this heavy metal icon.

    hilary duff thinks that her career has matured her in such a way that she does not relate to teenagers. said duff, "i've definitely grown up a little bit faster. i don't know if i really feel the same emotions as a regular 17-year-old." proving her astounding maturity, the "lizzie mcguire" star made lindsay lohan's little brother cry when she would not allow her boyfriend, good charlotte's joel madden, to sign any autographs for him.

    paul mccartney has started wearing acrylic nails while performing to preserve his own nails. just another example of the wonderful influence of heather mills.

    victoria beckham has filmed a commercial for china, urging "chinese to show more love and care for children stricken with leukemia." the commercial was needed as the chinese routinely beat cancer patients with sticks.

    imdb news:
  • liv tyler named her son milo.
  • brad pitt, matt damon, mick jagger and jim carrey had to be rushed from a london hotel after a fire broke out. jim dealt just fine and was seen crowd surfing at the premiere of the lemony snicket movie shortly thereafter.
  • whitney houston crashed her porsche into a bus in georgia. no way she was coked up at the time.
  • lisa marie presley has made her daddy roll over in his graceland grave yet again. she sold a huge amount of elvis's estate in a $100 million deal.
  • lisa's ex husband, michael jackson, won't let his pedophilia charges stop him from celebrating christmas with the kiddies. he's throwing a huge party for them at his neverland ranch.
  • donald trump doubts his january 22 wedding will be broadcast on tv, but you never know; trump nuptials has a nice ring to it.
  • claudia schiffer underwent a mystery brain scan at a london hospital.
  • brad pitt rushed home from planned promotional appearances for ocean's 12 after a close friend of jennifer aniston's passed away, proving he's just as interested in his wife's snatch as ever, despite recent speculations that their marriage is in trouble.

    lindsay snaps the boys with the zooms lindsay lohan hopes that the photographs she takes will steal the souls of the paparazzi that relentlessly follow her. guys, she's sick of rumors starting. but here's just one more, she's "definitely dating" colin farrell (via oh no they didn't).

    the gwyneth paltrow/yoko ono morph continues as she decides to go along with husband, chris martin on coldplay's next tour. look out for gwyneth and the coldplays's first cd in 2008.

    mary louise parker has been denying billy crudup the right to see their child because she is afraid he will bring along claire danes. i wouldn't let claire danes near my child either. i hear she's a big baby eater.

    renowned british bedhopper robbie williams is so desperate to have a new girlfriend for christmas he's even made jokes about doing television adverts to find one. hey robbie, there are plenty of girls that can be bought. kitty might lend you britpoppa for a few days.

    shed a tear for the love shack. the cabin that inspired the number 3 hit for the b-52's has burned down. officials have not ruled out a "hot pants explosion" as the cause of the conflagration.

    cameron diaz may use the footage that she has been filming of the photographers that hound her to make a movie about the paparazzi. you know, because the one that came out earlier this year was such a hit.

    shar jackson is looking to develop a pop career just like her baby daddy's wife, britney. she hopes 2005 will be an m-azing year for her group mpulz. more likely it will just be m-barassing. in other poorly thought out music industry decisions, jennifer lopez will record a duet with her husband, marc anthony, for her new album.

    could there be a paige davis sex tape on the loose? "trading spaces" fans will be shocked - and titillated (via golden fiddle).

    damnit. keira knightley will use a body double for her nude scenes in domino. girl, can't you throw a brother a bone?

    katie smells something stinky katie holmes makes a face while out shopping in santa monica. she was probably thinking about the trainwreck that was first daughter.
  • Thursday, December 16, 2004

    britpoppa knows how to pick 'em. my ex-boyfriend, neil campbell, creator of my naked dad, has done it again. read his hilarious new essay entitled, "film flubs" on the website for his los angeles comedy troupe, fireball deluxe, to discover some of the inaccuracies plaguing movies today. go neil, it's your birthday (it's not really his birthday, but he sure likes presents)!
    brandon morphs into jason no fair. mischa eats the ice cream and brandon's the one who gets the gut. nice pink shirt, preppy.

    according to numerous, most likely inaccurate sources, kirsten dunst is planning to marry jake gyllenhaal after recently reuniting with him. in order to win jake's hand, dunst first had to win over his protective mother. i bet she learned that mothers can be more formidable foes than dr. octagon and the green goblin combined.

    a cameraman from charlie's angels who was disappointed with bill murray's behavior on set crashed a vip q&a with the actor for the life aquatic in order to verbally abuse him. director wes anderson and co-star anjelica huston came to his rescue.

    also acting as knight in shining armor, at the post party for the nyc aviator premiere, "the entourage's" kevin connolly came to his girlfriend, nicky hilton's defense after he overheard someone making rude comments about her. how did he defend the real estate heiress? by making some rude comments himself. nicely played.

    britney spears won't be eating at the bellagio again any time soon. she pissed off the chef there when she fed a $150 steak to her tiny chihuahua, bitbit. the next day, bitbit did the biggest bm brit had ever seen.

    "survivor" host jeff probst may not have been eligible for the million dollar prize in vanuatu, but he won something else: contestant julie's heart. the two are happily dating despite a nearly 20-year age gap between them.

    sk8r grrrl avril loads on the eyeliner before knocking a few pucks around at the rca records annual hockey game.

    robbie williams had a steamy threeway with a lesbian couple. funny, i thought lesbians didn't sleep with men.

    mr. madonna, guy ritchie, would like to meet with british prime minister, tony blair, to tell him about the healing properties of kabbalah water and convince him to distribute it to wounded soldiers in iraq. sounds like this guy's cuckoo for jewish mysticism.

    andy bell of erasure hopes that his public declaration that he is hiv positive will help other with his disease to gain "a little respect". "there is still so much hysteria and ignorance surrounding hiv and aids," he said. "let's just get on with life."

    imdb news:
  • jennifer garner is sparking rumors that she may have a bun in the oven as her belly seems a little bloated these days. can't a girl have a little water weight gain without any speculation? similar false reports have sprung up in past months about j. lo, britney and christina.
  • goldie hawn and kurt russell have fought back against claims that their marriage is in trouble by being photographed together nude.
  • julia roberts may have lied to the press about her expected delivery date to get a little privacy. how could she?
  • an la cop who pulled tara reid over for speeding ended up encouraging her to go faster. unfortunately, the 130 mph speed she reached did not result in an accident.

    orlando bloom was spotted getting snuggly with a blonde that was not girlfriend, kate bosworth while in dubai for a film festival. maybe he's looking to date an entire fellowship of girls rather than just one.

    adorable coco cox-arquette delivers today's celebrity baby news. bam! meril lovelace lagasse was born to father emeril. the little hunk of meat weighed five lbs, 13 oz. popbitch speculates that kate moss may be with child again and that victoria beckham's supposed pregnancy may be a publicity stunt.
  • Wednesday, December 15, 2004

    you've been waiting with bated breath for nearly 36 hours and at last britpoppa is giving you your fix. ashley olsen and leelee sobieski were the celebrities with blackened out faces (and souls? maybe, i mean ash made peta's worst dressed list). anyway, these two are often singled out for their resemblance to mary-kate and helen hunt, respectively. neither of them have managed to live up to the hype. as for the guesses, ash was wrongly identified as drew barrymore, mandy moore, ellen (hilarious) and keira knightley. leelee got charlize theron, hillary swank, staci keenan and sheryl crow. two separate individuals managed to each guess one girl right. i'm impressed. until next week...
    rose mcgowan is likely to play ann-margaret in a new cbs mini-series about elvis. the network will launch a nationwide search for an actor to play the title role (via defamer). i'm betting they won't be able to do better than michael st. gerard, who not only played the king in the 1990 mini-series about him, but also in two other movies and an episode of "quantum leap". many also fondly remember mike as the hottie drama teacher, chris suiter, on "beverly hills, 90210" and as link larkin in hairspray. st. gerard's been mia since 1994. i think it's time for a comeback, michael. and so does a certain msn group. we miss you, man.

    is paris hilton suffering from "the curse of christina"? according to page sixsixsix, her extreme hairstyles could be causing a little bit of premature balding, something that has resulted in chaos on "the simple life" set. no wonder she's been wearing that wig.

    don't be surprised if lindsay lohan pulls a x-tina and goes stripped after the release of herbie: fully loaded. her handler proposed a photoshoot for playboy, but then reneged, citing lindsay's no nudity clause. that contract is up after her stint with the lovebug. score (via oh no they didn't)!

    and don't forget to get your guesses in for the semi-weekly celebrity guessing game. i'll reveal the ladies behind these looks tonight.